GOLDEN

Heavier than silver, gold still shines and sparkles.
It gleams and winks so you know it's there, it's still coveted and stolen, bought and traded.

I inserted the song by Jill Scott "Living My Life Like It's Golden" because that's where I am right now.  I'm 46 but somehow I feel okay with that (sometimes a little nervous about 'almost' 50)~!  I worked really hard to get right here - GOLDEN.   I left home at 15, had my daughter when I was 19 and was married twice by the time I was 25.  I had been to college, dropped out, went back and graduated...had jobs, moved all over the place and then bought a home by the time I was 26.   No time to come up for air, no time to breathe - a kid to raise, a divorce, a layoff, a new place to live, gain weight, lose weight - now what?!!

I remember when I was turning forty, a guy that I worked with said don't worry about 40 because that's when you really start to "LIVE YOUR LIFE"...not that I didn't live the hell out of my twenties, but he was right.  In my thirties things just 'happened' to me but somehow at forty I found myself closer to knowing myself, closer to having an answer and things don't seem to weigh on me the same way.  That's not to say I don't worry about money -  but when recently laid off - I took it as an opportunity to reinvent, try something new and start over.  GOLDEN.

Jill sings about "Taking My Freedom" and then what she plans to do with it...I know what I'm doing with mine and I'm GOLDEN.  Okay, maybe I'm broke, but I'm happy.  Maybe I'm turning 50 soon but I EARNED that - every minute of every hour in every day.  Mine and made by ME.  I'm not going to be one of those that sweats and crawls or runs away from "going over the hill".   When people jokingly ask how old I am I let them know.  Not 26 - I'm 46!  

Maybe it isn't the lyrics so much as the way she belts out her happiness...yes I'm free and I'm loving me and I'm letting life be whatever God has planned.  I'm not that religious but I can feel the joy and hope in that song.  Maybe I'll live until I'm 81 - like my father.  That puts me on the clock right?  But maybe, I'll live until I'm 99 - either way life is Golden when you just LIVE IT!   

By definition Golden as a slang term means "good" or "prepared"..."Did you pack everything we need in the cooler for this trip?" - "yeah, we are GOLDEN".  GOLDEN